You ever have a worst day, or maybe a week? And really, it isn’t like THE worst day. I mean, nobody dies or anything, but the day just seems to have a lot of snags, and maybe you just should have stayed in bed? I must share such a day with you now.

I need to preface this story with the fact that this was day three for me without a cigarette so my mindset was off kilter to begin with. That was probably putting it mildly. I was irritated with everything. That morning my friend Brenda mentioned in passing that burning a lavender candle soothed her spirits and I thought to myself that I should order one.

Later that day I went to Miller Waldrop to try to buy a nice set of sheets for my bed. The store didn’t have type of sheets I wanted, so the salesperson recommended that I check at Walmart across the street. However, while in the store looking at sheets, I noticed a HUGE, beautiful lavender candle in giant sparkly glass container the size of a small wastebasket. It was lovely, it was expensive, and I absolutely had to have it. I also thought what a laugh it would be when I walked into the house carrying this giant candle to sooth my nerves. She wrapped it carefully for me and after purchase we placed the candle in the passenger seat of my car.

Next, I was off to buy the sheets. There is a reason I normally don’t go to Walmart and this day proved to be no exception. I was soon in line between a person trying to purchase alcohol from a clerk that was underage and a mother with a crying four-year-old begging for a candy bar. It was enough to make me lose focus and leave the store, but after a few Walmart moments (they’re like football minutes except slower) I emerged from the store with the desired sheets. I was craving a cigarette but I was determined to get home and burn that lavender candle instead.

A few moments later as I was driving home, a silver jeep suddenly came careening into my lane. I had a millisecond to react and I swerved into the next lane to avoid an accident. In slow motion I could see my beautiful jar with the heavenly candle fly off of the seat. It went up, up, up in the air – the sparkling twinkling of the glass jar saying its goodbyes to me - and crashed into the floorboard below. I heard the crushing sound of glass. I couldn’t look. I was sure it was destroyed and I felt destroyed too. I was like a little kid whose ice cream had fallen from the cone to the ground. I wanted someone to pay! I was so looking forward to burning that candle. I proceeded to cry a bit and yell like an idiot at the driver of the other car who ignored me.

I got home in sniffles and tried to salvage my candle – putting it into another large container. I lit the remains and watched as it melted in so many ways but the right direction. I thought – this just can’t be happening. The lavender was supposed be soothing my spirit right now and it’s not!

But wait! All is not lost, I thought. I had new sheets. Time to get these babies washed and ready to go! I looked at the package and read “700 count, cotton cooling sheets”. All good and deep purple too. These will be nice! Now I ripped open the package and surveyed the contents. Hmmm. The material was a little skimpy in my hands. Did they give me a twin set? No. hmmm. It’s not a set at all is it. I have bought a single sheet and two pillowcases! And to make matters worse - of course, I had by now thrown away parts of the packaging and the receipt – not to mention that Walmart is 30 minutes from my house. At this point I went off the wagon from my 3-day cigarette sobriety and lit up a delicious and totally ill-advised cylinder of nicotine.

Brenda was laughing when I came home and she heard and saw these things. She reminded me that we’ve all had days like this. We consoled one another for a while and then I put on Mary Chapin Carpenter, “I Feel Lucky” and started my path to cigarette abstinence once again.

(Note: I have now been cigarette free since October 2021 – worst days, and all 😊)